Watching the world go by ... [Saturday post]
At last, a day spent away from the lab. After several weeks of total dullness, I went to town today, pretending to shop, despite the fact i don't have any money to spend. The joy of walking up and down the parade, with no watch on my wrist or timer bleeping in my pocket, was quite overwhelming.
When I say a day, I am a bit optimistic, since I only left the farm and my laptop at 11.30, and now it is 16.00 and I'm back in my usual chair in front of the PC, with the buzzing sound of the flow hood behing me...
A few hours, a weak taste of freedom, but just the feeling things could be quite cool once the Ph.D is over.
Yesterday night, I found myself brwsing the leaflets and catalogs I collected more than a year ago, at the Destination travel show. As every time I do that, my feet got itchy, and I started planning fantasy trips to China, Vietnam and Japan, only to realise [or rather, aknowledge the fact] that I don't have any time or money right now, and that the only thing stopping me is my thesis [it could have been a boyfriend, a baby, a sick relative, but no, that's something as silly and trivial as a bunch of scribbled sheets of paper].
After stocking up on fad foods like aduki beans and soya flour [damn you, Gillian Mc Keith] I ended up pushing the local Starbeurk's door, I sat myself on one of the stools facing the windows, and proceeded to stuff my face with a sticky, greasy mozarella panini and a skinny blueberry muffin [I think I could be kidding myself, there...] washed down with a cup of [scalding] Earl grey. As I was smearing my face with the grease [I'll regret that tomorrow, I guess] I was enjoying one of my favorite things: people watching. I spent 40 minutes like that, the eyes wandering up and down the patch of road in front of me, looking at the Sienna Miller lookalike and other try-hards, the teenage mums and the scruffy kids. I also realised that my girlfriends here do not react to girls as I do. I always check girls out. Their outfits, shoes, hair, teeth, make-up, attitudes... I even thing I spend more time looking at girls than blokes [not really surprising, considering the lack of super-studs in the area...]. At the end of my "quality meal" I had engulfed enough calories to keep me warm for the week, and I had seen enough try-hards in action to stop me want to spend my cash on clothes everybody seem to own. So I dragged myself back here. Back to the lab, where there is no temptation other than the vending machine [I trick myself by leaving my purse in the car, how cunning...]. In 4 week, that was only the second time I was going out "in the wild". And it just reminded me everything is more simple when I stay here, with my cultures, my PCRs and my PC.
Tonight, I won't go to the cinema on my own, as planned [never done it yet, even if it is apparently the ultimate singleton thing to do]. To much exposure to people. I'll stay in the farm to do experimental baking. It will be baking without wheat flour, butter or refined sugar... god knows what it's going to look [and taste] like, but at least it will save me from stepping in the cinema on my own and realising that I can't even find somebody to go to the movie with me...
I'll do baking, and will go to bed early, with the satisfaction one can have by slacking and munching on carbs all day.
# mimile, le Lundi 31 Janvier 2005, 09:55 dans "bienvenue sur l ile maudite".
Ecrit par mimile le Lundi 31 Janvier 2005, 13:56
ca le fond, y a pas de risque que ca change; pour la langue, ca ressemble plus a ce qui passe dans ma tete une journee sans contact avec qui que ce soit .
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Post-doc v 1.0
- Nice office
- Big lab
- Rebellious tec
- Too many papers to write
- Organic chrmistry
- NMR pour les nuls
et autres joyeusetes